Ladies, don’t you just hate the conspicuously audible crunch that results when you bite into a Dorito? How unladylike! Or what about the unsightly orange dust that cakes up on your fingertips, especially right after you’ve been to the nail salon?
Then there’s the problem of what to do with that large chip bag after you’ve finished stuffing your face. Even if you’ve polished off half the chips, the bag is still too bulky to fit comfortably in your handbag.
If these problems have long plagued you, you’ll be delighted to know that help has arrived. PepsiCo, that conglomerate that owns Frito Lay, has devised the Dorito for the “fairer sex.”
In an interview with Time magazine, the company’s president, Indra Nooyi, revealed that they have come up with a “low-crunch” chip with the same “taste [sic: flavor] profile” that won’t stick to your fingers. After all, women, Nooyi explains, “don’t like to crunch too loudly in public. And they don’t lick their fingers generously and they don’t like to pour the little broken pieces and the flavor into their mouth.”
So far, the reaction from the Twitterverse has been pretty negative:
Good news, ladies. We got a female Colonel Sanders and Doritos that don’t crunch, so feminism is cancelled. We’ve achieved equality.
— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) February 5, 2018
speak for YOURSELF. i have long been waiting for a lady chip, and will now launch a campaign to pressure the Doritos company to add a kind of hijab-like layer to each modest serving. #Shariatos https://t.co/zKyMGn7uhO
— Hend Amry (@LibyaLiberty) February 5, 2018
In response to Doritos lady friendly crisps I shall be eating the biggest crisps I can find crunching really loudly burping and carrying a packet of crisps as a handbag
— kate ford (@kateford76) February 5, 2018
What’s your take, ladies?